Feedback Friday: The Mom Uniform

June-Cleaver-Vintage-Aprons

Those pearls wouldn’t last a minute in a bouncy house with my kids.

Earlier this week I made the rather heartbreaking decision to retire my yoga pants because, as stated in my post entitled: Yoga Pants & Prescription Pills, they had become the dominant piece in my lazy mom uniform. This difficult, albeit necessary, decision forced me to re-assess mommy style as a whole, and actually got me thinking about how drastically our uniform, lazy or not, has changed over the years.

Take for example, the quintessential 50’s mom, June Cleaver. Her impeccably tailored house dress and matching apron was, from what I understand, a fairly accurate representation of motherhood for the time and what I would consider her uniform.  Compare that to a head-to-toe velour sweat suit with the word “pink” across the ass and you can see just how much we’ve evolved, or how far we’ve fallen, depending on your opinion of sweats. [Read more…]

From The Mouth Of Babes

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Wise beyond her years.

 

A transcript from an actual conversation yesterday.

Olivia:     Mommy?

Me:          Yes?

Olivia:     Mommy?

Me:          Yes?

Olivia:     Mommy?

Me:          Yes?

Olivia:     Mommy?

Me:          Yes?

Olivia:     Mommy?

Me:          Yes!?!

Olivia:     Nose.

Me:          You win Olivia.  You win.

Look forward to more insight courtesy of my children coming soon.

Yoga Pants & Prescription Pills

lululemon-logo-jpg_133915My dear friend and Style & Design Expert, Sabrina Soto, wrote a very poignant article for her Online Lifestyle Magazine Casa & Company entitled To Wear, Or Not To Wear Yoga Pants. In it, she compares yoga pants to “prescription drugs” saying that when “used properly and in moderation [they] can really help your body, but if abused [they] can be highly addictive and cause permanent damage.”

As a serial yoga pant wearer, I could not agree more.

I am not afraid to admit, and my husband will attest to the fact, that as of late, my relationship with my lululemon’s has become somewhat toxic. Despite the fact that they have literally been there for me through thick and thin and have made my life exponentially more cozy with their delicate blend of nylon and Lycra, they have also become my lazy mom uniform.

I do not wear them all day, everyday because I am in a perpetual state of cardiovascular activity, I wear them all day, everyday because they are easy and require minimal energy to get into.  Something that I cannot always say about my jeans

My yoga pants never ask me to button or zip them, they don’t require dry cleaning or fancy detergents and they go with everything including, but not limited to: flip flops, sweatshirts and unwashed hair.  As a stay-at-home mom, I have found no other item of clothing that gives so much and asks so little in return and that of course, is the problem. [Read more…]

Feedback Friday: The Halloween Dilemma

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Halloween Circa 1983. Just a couple of witches.

As admitted yesterday in my exceptionally classy post Porn For Parents?, I have had an ass full of Halloween crap over the past few weeks as a result of my more aggressive approach to social media.

In addition to all of the crafts and activities, an issue that has been discussed at length amongst my favorite blogs is the tradition of Trick or Treating and how the institution for some people, is, and has been for quite some time, evolving into something entirely different from when we were kids. [Read more…]

Porn For Parents?

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Seriously? Who has time for this shit?

Whilst trolling the internet over the past few weeks, I have become painfully aware that when it comes to all things Halloween, I am definitely failing as a mother. The number of Facebook posts, Tweets and Pinterest pins of adorable Halloween ideas for kids is astonishing and my having no part in any of it, prompts me to ask the question “who has time for this shit?”

Just yesterday, one of my favorite blogs, Red Tricycle featured an article entitled:  Adorable Lunch Ideas for Halloween and to be honest, it made me want to blow my brains out. Not because it didn’t feature the cutest little spooky lunch ideas I had ever seen, but because that very morning I had struggled to make my son a regular old bagel with cream cheese for his, very un-spooky lunch.  This post, (as seen in the photo courtesy of redtri.com) actually suggested making mini coffins out of pumpernickel bread and a Frankenstein head out of kiwi, two things you will never find in my kitchen. [Read more…]

You Know You’ve Got Little Kids If…

Strapped in and asleep. The only way to travel.

Strapped in and asleep. The only way to travel.

Do any of these sound familiar?  You Know You’ve Got Little Kids If…

You long for the day where you choose a restaurant because of it’s wine list instead of whether or not it has crayons at the hostess stand.

You’ve ever gone for “a little drive” just so that you can get out and see the world with your kids securely fastened in a 5 point harness.

You’ve ever said “That’s so interesting” or “Uh-huh really?” but have no clue what the other person is talking about and have absolutely no intention of finding out.

You’ve ever purposely lost a game of Uno to avoid a meltdown.

You’ve ever yelled at Dora for telling your kids to be “LOUDER!”.

You’ve had to repeat the words “get dressed” more than twenty times in a single hour and you are not a doctor. [Read more…]

Best Laid Plans

I wish I could say this is a misrepresentation of our daily menu but it is not.

I feel like this is a pretty accurate representation of our menu.  Minus the olives and the martini.

We are having, and have had for quite some time now, a bit of a problem when it comes to planning meals in our home.  More specifically, we don’t.  Instead, every evening at about 5 o’clock I look in the refrigerator and hope that ingredients will magically appear and inspire me to create a culinary masterpiece.  When that doesn’t happen, I usually grab the kids, throw them in the car and let our sustenance needs, be the Olive Garden’s problem.

Lately, however, my kids are starting to revolt against the idea of eating out and the thing that used to make them jump up and down in excitement is now evoking “I wanna eat at home” meltdowns.  It was after the third day of tears that I realized that I had to make a change or risk having my own kids call CPS on me.  Naturally, I called my mother, who as I remember, never allowed us to eat out unless we were celebrating a birthday, or someone had died, which consequently, made it really hard to know how to feel about The Little Beaver Restaurant. [Read more…]

Feedback Friday: The Second Time Around

We ruined our first-born pretty early on.

We ruined our first-born pretty early on.

My Grandmother has always been a firm believer that kids are like waffles. No matter how hard you try, you always have to throw the first one out.  Before I had kids, a statement such as this would have led me to believe that she had lost her mind, but now that I have two little waffles of my own, I am starting to understand what she meant.   [Read more…]